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Monday, April 27, 2015

Coping with celebrity contact on Twitter and other Social Media

How I dealt with a situation with Nancy Sinatra on Twitter.


Sunday, April 26, 2015


She peered through the window but not really good enough to see the full street view.
She crept back into the air bed a quasi creature comfort.
She pondered the ways of deprivation vs. enrichment.
She listened to the radio preacher who said don't live in the past, live for the future.
She embraced the bold gold walls the landlord insisted on keeping intact.
She ignored all living things that day.
a predisposed curse.
loss of energy.
loss of life.
While her work hours increased.
her social life faded.
She climbed the walls of local coffee pubs but no one saw her.
She observed the fat guy on the stool at Beaners and wondered what his life meant.
She circled the rest room 3-4 times and watched its still graffiti.
She ordered one more latte
til she felt her soul perish.
She was tired of sitting so she woke up and walked the Lakeshore.
you could walk for miles on the infamous shoreline and maybe catch a glance but not one full fish.
She saw the earnest runners in their fiber something tights.
There were no waves on Lake Superior when it was placid but there was that icy breeze.
She lay dying in the winter
barely coherent in the Spring.
her time was up.

**I purposely put a few distinct taglines because the movie "Ask Me Anything" said it  catches a bigger audience.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Finding the Bones of Jack (Johnny Cash's brother)

She grazed over the damp, moist field.  She was determined to find him.  Breathing heavy, her woolen sweater stuck to her body in the morning dew and her skin raised with bumps of tingling.  Sh had got off on the Greyhound, two miles East.   Measuring the road in her footsteps one step of mild pain mixed with memorable recall, she searched for Jack's grave.  She had to find the place in the same way Flannery O'Connors soul tugged at her in the middle of the night.  In the South, the spirits would come alive.  The past and present collided.  The crimson lane of her traveling blood veins had brought her to this place of rest and a settled soul.   Shake the dice and she would find her history in other's pain.  Pain traveled through her body, trampling over the roads of the forgotten, a tourist's finger pointed by a passing car: "That's where Jack was buried.  Do you remember Johnny Cash?  His voice was rich like the clay of the earth, deep like a canyon that gave me some sort of warmth that comforted your ears."...  Yeah, that's my Johnny.  My new found blood kin.  As she strode through the streets, she found him in every shadow just like she felt Jack's bones.  The point of his death in 1944 traveled to the dark ashes of her soul into a ravine that she couldn't dig out.  It paralleled her sister's abandonment of her that standoffishness that was wasn't created from true grit, family lineage blood but from a certain air of disapproval.  Those feelings became a turbine mixer as she ousted her own bloodline and developed that canal of fame driven attachment.  The kind where you take on the mannerisms of your idols.  Her gray sweater creeping on her arms, she brushed her dirty blonde hair off her face and a truck slowed down on the highway.  "You wanna ride, miss?"  "Yeah," she sighed and lifted her checkered suitcase into the truck.

to be continued

Sunday, April 19, 2015

I won, victory over my accuser.

I won the PayPal dispute but the real victory is that I don't have to name call, badger or inflict harm on another person.  Writing 2 goodbye letters in an 8 month period is not considered being a stalker.  In fact, you did not respond to either Jon or my last email from BTR in August, 2014.  You never said do not contact, you just disappeared.  The only reason I had to contact you after that is to request you put the 200 plus episodes back on your BTR webpage which BTR had to manually do and it took them 24 hours total.  I don't need to win the argument or the friendship back.  I just need to point out you did not choose a rational form of communication.  You just name called and swore.  You don't go to church, you are not involved in a Christian fellowship, you continue in a self involved selfish lifestyle.  You don't earn money or contribute to Brian's household.  You are what is known as a MOOCH.  You always have been and will be and you turn on people who try and help you.  Mooch is not a swear word.  It's just an accurate description of you.  And you should get legally punished for not signing up for Obamacare.  When you go to the hospital someday for an impending illness, you will be S.O.L.  Then the world of anarchy cannot save you.

This is for Marguerite and Joan who recouped their phone bill money after 20 plus years. Maybe PayPal put your balance back to zero from -$500.  Nothing from nothing leaves nothing. Get a job yourself......I don't have to create a fantasy vlog about an otherwise non exciting life. There is no more bones to pick but 20 years ago, the church and my family forgave you for taking our money.  The only one who did not forgive you was Uncle Paul.  And he still has not until this day.  You said on the air on radio you never were once sorry for causing Marguerite a $1300 debt.  You were overpaid for BTR services and I did make a claim for a refund.  I am not bitter either.  I know when someone leaves without giving an explanation that it wasn't worth it.  For me, I held on to what is dear to me which was my true friends.  I've seen you walk away fact you do it all the time.  No big deal, huh?

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Novel Chapter ?

If I tell you the truth, will you leave me alone now?  I could have left it dormat forever.  Like a faraway song inside my head or another, those who have a memory of me.  My son would have perhaps been confused but he would not have taken that extra time to get to know me and even if he tried, he might have had to swindle it out of me.
There was a point where I let things fall away.  It's not that I didn't want my actions to result in consequences.  I just imagined this very large river, kinda like an outwash where the unplanned actions would merge and all mistakes or intended unguided mindsets would accumulate there.  In the framework of my mind, I knew there still would be rent to pay and more regular bills but it was going to be solved in the context of some grandiose crescendo, not the normal humdrum of a full time job or working overtime.  I was consciously looking for that breakthrough.


I rounded the bend but then there were 3 more curves

to be continued

copyright @Jane Hoffman

As you can see, I am short on time these days.  I am adding another entry at midnight tonight.

Friday, April 10, 2015

As I knew him

I am writing a self autobiographical memoir/possibly novel.  I just don't know what period of my life I will begin.

For now, I'll call him Holden.  He never reached his peak as far as looks but he once looked liked Elvis.  That first moment of crisis, his parent's divorce, was more than a self realization.  It was the fact they could no longer love each other and possibly not another human being.  It happened at a time when people didn't divorce much.  It was the Bible belt, after all.  He had come from a preachin' family and it was bad publicity.  His mother, who cornered the market on fashion, was perceived as a doting or perhaps, douty wife.  Yet she was feisty and non subservient.  The father was driven away by his own sexual desires.  It was no one's fault....but his.   Years later, he never really apologized for it.

People who have died suddenly in the last few years (or unexpectedly)

E.  Christmas (former roommate) 2012  heart problem
John DeMaster (lifelong WBL resident) 2012 ATV accident
Greg Taylor (former neighbor) 2015 choking on popcorn

I know there have been more.  I just can't think of them now.  I'm at my graveyard job.  It's 4:54 a.m. and this job requires I stay up all night.  I don't even know that many people here in Duluth but someone in my Gambling group's wife is in the hospital and is in serious condition.